Lawyers, Guns & Money

Milham gave me a history on the staff.  He couldn’t confirm if everything Eugenia and Cori said was true, but he could confirm that they probably made it up.  He said that Crane made the staff in New Orleans by way of blood magic sacrifice.  The stuff they said about him killing all the otherContinue reading “Lawyers, Guns & Money”

The Shine

The interior of Rook Takes Pawnshop was not what I expected.  It’s a big space and most of it is empty.  There are a couple cases with jewelry in them and a lot more swords than I was expecting.  Who’s pawning all these swords?   Milham walked back to an office that was ridiculously small comparedContinue reading “The Shine”

Idyll hands

I never know what to do with my hands when I’m having a conversation.  If you cross your arms you seem angry.  If you stick your hands in your pockets you seem schlubby.  So I’m left dangling them at my sides awkwardly. That’s why I like a Denny’s conversation.  You’ve got food to keep yourContinue reading “Idyll hands”

I’m not the one who’s so far away

I’ve never been to a pawnshop before.  I’ve never owned much to pawn.  I drive by them a lot and they never look open.  They never have any parking either.  They seem to be a storefront right out on the edge of the street. Rook Takes Pawnshop isn’t like those others I’ve driven by, itContinue reading “I’m not the one who’s so far away”

The end of the tour

I thought the NVC had agreed to wait for me but they no-showed Lubbock.  I thought that Chadd 2 Badd would have been pissed off about that but he didn’t seem to care.  He said that he was surprised that they bothered to show up at any of the events he booked.  He said theContinue reading “The end of the tour”

The best ability is availability

Once I told them I was interested, the NVC wanted to leave immediately to meet with their Russian-Peruvian Voodoo man.  Why did it have to be FTF?  Why couldn’t they just call him?  Unclear.    I told them that I had a couple more bookings with Longhorn Wrestling and their response was that they did too, and weContinue reading “The best ability is availability”

Rejected again

When we had a moment to ourselves, I asked 42561 what she thought of the NVC’s story.  Her response was that she didn’t believe any of it.  She said it in a way that made it sound like she also didn’t care.  I told her about Obaluaiye and Dennis “Scrap Iron” and what the oldContinue reading “Rejected again”

Why do some wizards have staffs and some have wands? And is there a word that doesn’t also mean penis?

The NVC told me a similar story to the one that Stella (RIP Stella, sorry I got you murdered) did about how a Confederate guy learned magic to try and win the war but the war ended before he could pull it off, so then he and all his Confederate sorcerer friends got killed byContinue reading “Why do some wizards have staffs and some have wands? And is there a word that doesn’t also mean penis?”

Lethal Weapon 8 : Die Hard VS Fast and Furious – Rise of the Transformers

I’ve noticed that when they make an action movie with a female main character, it’s always very serious.  Her husband gets killed by drug runners or her car breaks down and she gets gang raped by hillbillies or her kids get blown up by terrorists.  She’s out for bloody revenge.  If an action movie hasContinue reading “Lethal Weapon 8 : Die Hard VS Fast and Furious – Rise of the Transformers”

The Change-Up 2 : Freaky Friday 5 The Hot Tub Time Machine

I figured it out.  Cori and Eugenia, aka Nightmare Violence Connection, act like they’re characters in one of those stupid movies where people switch bodies.  They’re dude bros that grabbed a witch’s ass so she put a curse on them.  They’ve been gender swapped so they can learn respect for women.  Except instead they wokeContinue reading “The Change-Up 2 : Freaky Friday 5 The Hot Tub Time Machine”