Did I already do the Camila Cabello joke?

The club in Havana – Florida, not Cuba – is abandoned.  I don’t know why I thought they would still be hanging out there.  I brought the cops down on that place.  They went somewhere else to do their dirt.  How do you get in touch with a black magic torture gang?  I used myContinue reading “Did I already do the Camila Cabello joke?”

Hard way

I’m dipped out of a loop across Georgia and Florida to swing over to Tallahassee to see Kim.  Not Killer Kelly Kim, the other one.  I tried to sneak the philosophical concept of killing and its possible justifications in casual conversation.  He saw through me.  He asked me who I wanted killed.  He likes peopleContinue reading “Hard way”


Stella’s mom took me up to the 4th floor to show me a book that has the spell that can bring Stella back.  She’s right, the spell is not complicated.  You just have to be willing to commit murder.  No, five murders. I figured out that she didn’t have to take me up there.  SheContinue reading “Reach”

Wash your hands

I didn’t know that there were big forests in Alabama.  That sounds stupid but I thought that the Pacific Northwest was timber country.  I drove past several huge timber trucks.  I saw signs for the Alabama Loggers Council by the road.  Stella’s family’s compound is in the woods.  I knew her family was rich butContinue reading “Wash your hands”

How to make decisions

I hardly ever get asked for an autograph.  Maybe I would be more often if I sold merch.  I should get some merch.  Not because I want people to ask for my autograph.  After my show last night, a guy with bushy sideburns and a denim shirt asked for my autograph.  After I signed, heContinue reading “How to make decisions”

Operation Steel Tiger Shark

It’s hard to believe.  My plans never work.  Lance and I sat in his Lincoln Navigator outside the compound and watched the cars and trucks drive away with all the guys and guns.  Lance had drones flying around that let us see the whole place.  There were a couple old timers and some kids leftContinue reading “Operation Steel Tiger Shark”

You might leave here should others take your place 

Before I met Stella I would have told you that necromancy is using magic for creating zombies.  You know how she felt about the “z” word.  The internet defines necromancy as “the supposed practice of communicating with the dead, especially in order to predict the future”.  Séances and stuff like that.  Why would dead people know the future? Continue reading “You might leave here should others take your place “

Death be not proud

The plan is for Lance to “investigate” for a few days.  Then he’ll tell the Texas Confederate Mafia that he has found the Robert Lee gun thieves holed up at an abandoned farmhouse.  The ATF will be lying in wait for them there while simultaneously raiding their weapons caches.  The ones they know.  There areContinue reading “Death be not proud”

Dr. Reid suffers from a brain injury and, while experiencing hallucinations, is visited by ghosts from his past

The ATF office in Houston is in a glass building in the Beltway Lakes office complex.  I thought government agencies had their own space but they pay rent and have roommates just like everyone else.  Disappointing.  Good thing I don’t pay taxes.  I was shown into a conference room that had four dudes that allContinue reading “Dr. Reid suffers from a brain injury and, while experiencing hallucinations, is visited by ghosts from his past”

Coitus interruptus sounds like some Harry Potter bullshit

So does Ex Fiancé I assume that the old gun is the focus for the redneck magic.  We took all the paraphernalia we could carry just in case.  We burned everything burnable and tossed the gun in the river.  I was feeling pretty good about the night’s work until we got back to the motelContinue reading “Coitus interruptus sounds like some Harry Potter bullshit”