Good thing she didn’t have a gun

Waiting in the parking lot while other more deserving women became empowered, I did some more digging on social media.  Several of her college teammates are members of this group and I think a woman who was their coach at Tulane is the one who brought them into it.  It seemed a little culty but it may not have anything to do with anything.   

Once the thing was over, I followed her home.  The only thing I could figure was to ask her point blank if she had any magic shit going on.  That’s what I did with Gary.  And it technically worked with him.

Turns out that approaching a woman at her home after dark without any preamble is a bad idea.  I barely got a word out before she swiveled and hit me with the pepper spray.  She jabbed me with her keys too before running for her front door.   

I tried my cleansing spell but it did nothing to stop the streaming eye pain.  I guess that only works on chemicals inside your body.  I figured if I tried to drive I’d ram into something, so I was still there when the cops showed up.  Honestly it felt like they were there in two fucking minutes.  This must be a really nice neighborhood. 

I told them I had been at the seminar, recognized her from her basketball days and wanted to ask her for her autograph.  Because who wouldn’t want the autograph of a college player that averaged 6 points a game 10 years ago at a program no one gives a shit about?  I apologized profusely for scaring her and admitted I wasn’t thinking.   

They messed with my ID for a LONG time.  I should probably get some real ID instead of relying only on my fake ID spell.  Of course then I would probably have my name connected to a lot of criminal investigations.   

Eventually one of the cops went up to the door to talk to her and they let me go with a “don’t be so stupid you moron” lecture. 

I waited a couple hours before I went back to break in. 

Published by sopantooth

Putting clients first by putting employees first, immediately after prioritizing fiscal responsibilities and leveraging profitability towards exceeding by empowering our employees to put clients (and themselves) first, in a diverse and respectful environment of only those that come first, first.

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