There’s also a Newark in Delaware

I mentioned before that magic isn’t the kind of thing you want to try and learn by trial and error – that’s a good way to fuck things up real bad.  I know this because even with my relatively short apprenticeship, I was told it many times.  Despite these warnings, like most people I still had to find out for myself the hard way.  I was only apprenticed to Obaluaiye for about three weeks before he disappeared and I came back to the states.  Three weeks of magic training is about the same as three weeks of wrestling training – you’ve learned just enough to think you know what you’re doing and almost get yourself killed.

This was before I knew how to create a fetch, so I thought it would be a good idea to figure out a way to protect myself with a force field while I was in the ring.  Even if it had worked, I don’t know if it would have worked because my body would still be slamming into the force field right?  If you know how force field physics works let me know on that.  I figured I knew the basics (I didn’t) so I tried to put together a protection spell. 

The first thing that happened is that I almost suffocated, I guess I had succeeded in protecting my throat from being able to get air in it.  That only lasted for a couple of seconds.  The short duration was probably completely by accident because at that time I didn’t know how to control the length of a spell.  I bet the spell “worked” and I was just doing the wrong thing.  If I had been more advanced and tried to make the spell for say a minute, it would have lasted that long and I would have died.  Or at least passed out?  Not sure how long it takes to suffocate.

The second thing that happened is after I stopped choking on nothing, the motel room was infested with the most virulent stench known to man.  I’ve been near landfills that smelled like a field of daisies by comparison.  It was so bad that I fled the room immediately and burned the clothes that I was wearing.  If you ever go to the Roadway Inn in Newark, Ohio don’t get room 14, or any room near it.  Or just don’t go there at all, the place was a dump before it was magically stink-bombed anyway. 

This unbelievable stench makes no sense to me.  The air thing kind of tracks, I was trying to keep something away from me – damage and pain and the spell went awry and kept air away instead.  But what did I do that conjured up that incredible smell?  I have no idea.  And that’s the point.  When you’re dealing with magic you need to be one million percent sure about every single thing you’re doing.  A stray word here or a stray thought there and you’ve turned yourself inside out – or the poor slob next door.  Even once you’re sure, make sure you’re more sure before you do anything.  Magic isn’t the kind of thing where you can “wing it” and hope for the best.

I wonder how many fledging magic people kill themselves in the first stage of their learning.  Probably a lot.  No wonder there’s so few of us.

Published by sopantooth

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